Home > Hilarity, Internet, Navel-Gazing > Good Old-Fashioned Wholesome Fun With Search Engine Terms #10

Good Old-Fashioned Wholesome Fun With Search Engine Terms #10

Like Real Madrid, I’ve reached La Decima in this series of posts chronicling the oddest sets of words entered into search engines to lead websurfers to this blog. Unlike Real Madrid, I did not collaborate with a fascist dictator in order to do so. I didn’t employ Cristiano Ronaldo to make it happen either, which may be worse than cozying up to Franco. Anyway, back on topic: amusing search terms, the tenth installment. Probably the appropriate thing to do would be to choose ten examples, so of course I chose twelve.

chevalier homosocial

No, that’s not what “homosocial” means. Don’t be bigoted.

visual metaphors in harry potter

Quidditch is an allegory for the social democratic welfare state. Think about it. No, think harder.

british soldiers flayed alive

Nope, none of that here. Try a Mel Gibson movie, maybe?

jar jar binks racist

He’s not a racist, he’s just kind of dumb and irritating and loud and nobody likes him. You can be those things and not be a racist, but it’s tough to be a racist without also being those things. Necessary/sufficient conditions kind of thing.

crebain from dunland

“Nothing, it’s just a wisp of cloud.” “It’s moving fast, against the wind…” Incidentally, I always thought it odd that Legloas could tell that the birds were from Dunland. Was a member of the flock carrying a flag or something?

good thesis statement regarding the lego movie

It shouldn’t be surprising that a great number of the searches that point to this blog are clearly undertaken either by students looking for essay ideas or by their instructors trying to catch them plagiarizing. This is far from the only one, merely the laziest.

navel fanfiction

I’m gonna go ahead and assume that’s a typo and they’re looking for some amateur fanfic focusing on the bygone era of sailing ships. Because the alternative is both too icky and too weirdly specific to contemplate.

nicolas cage grave new orleans

I was preparing a snarky joke about how Nic Cage might not need a grave but his career sure does (haw haw!). And that may well have proven sufficient. But googling it turned up something much weirder: the actor’s pre-purchased pyramid-shaped burial plot and monument in a New Orleans cemetery, complete with pretentious New-Age-y Latin motto. Wondrous.

infantile crisis wallpaper batman

No crisis is infantile when you have Batman wallpaper. The darkness of the human soul is your domestic decoration. You dwell in the shadows, and the shadows know you well.

(Please to imagine that read in Christian Bale’s growly philosophic Batman voice. Or at least Abed’s impersonation of the Christian Bale growly philosophic Batman voice.)

weakness of film beowulf

Can I have “Naked Golden Angelina Jolie” for $600, Alex?

wholesome detective novels

Nancy Drew? The Hardy Boys? Jesus H. Christ, Private Eye?

film analysis professional

Sure, go ahead and rub it in. Jerk.

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